Ok, to start off this post about shoes, and before we get to the beautiful shoes I’ve chosen for this month’s focus, I’m going to tell you a story… about shoes.
Many many years ago when I was a little goth darling and MySpace was everything, my obsession with footwear was very much present in my life. Back then though I was interested in alternative/gothic shoes, which given my style of the time is a bit predictable.
My taste in shoes, although mostly black, varied just as much then as they do now, and although I’d have my cute lace maryjanes to wear shopping, or my knee-high patent boots for clubbing, I also collected 6 inch heels because damn, they were so beautiful!!
These shoes were simply there to sit on a shelf, looking pretty like a piece of wearable art. These were the shoes the Gothic models of the early naughties wore with their corsets and bustle skirts, and having those shoes on display made me feel elegant, and powerful, and somehow connected to these beautiful gothic graces.
These beautifully crafted, ridiculously high heels were art. They were petite and covered in brocades and lace and all manner of prettiness. My girlfriends would purr over them as we discussed out favourite models and my guyfriends would likewise compliment them also noting their favourite models (it was a very different time…).
One day I started dating a guy who wasn’t from goth or metal scene and had never scene shoes like these in his life, any where other than a strip club that is. Upon seeing my skyhigh heel collection he asked, whilst gesturing towards my bed:
“Are you going to wear them for me?”
I was horrified. Shocked. This person had taken something that to me was beautiful and powerful and fun and made it all about sex.
He had sexualised my shoes.
Now, needless to say that guy didn’t last very long in my life, but his words and sentiment have remained with me, as they would, because sexualising shoes, or any item of clothing for that matter, is unacceptable.
I would love to sit here and say this is the only time this has happened in my life, however having petite feet and a thing for high heels, the number of foot fetishists I’ve had to deal with in my life is above average. I have had my shoes sexualised too many times to count and quite frankly, I think this is a bit unreasonable.
Fashion should only ever be sexualised by the wearer if that is their intent, and we should never be made to feel we need to wear sexy this or sexy that to appeal to another person, or fit into their fetishes or fantisies. Nor should we ever be made to feel uncomfortable with what we’re donning due to a persons beliefs or thoughts towards said sartorial choice.
Just like shoes, we should not be sexualised unless it’s something we are wanting and consenting too. Just because a woman wears lingerie, or a bikini, or a bodycon dress – she should not be sexualised unless she herself wants to be. No one has the right to sexualise you except for you.
With that story, and slight rant aside, this month’s shoes are not sexy, but they do make me feel pretty.
They are a soft blush because I’m presently (and forever, let’s be honest) obsessed with this colour. Satin, silk, sparkles and frills bedeck these heels and in all honesty, I just wanted to find the prettiest pink shoes I could to share with you!
Although I haven’t got my hands on any of the below, I do have these pretty lil’ things in my wardrobe!
DON’T MAKE ME BLUSH!
Are you a fan of pink and blush? Want to see any styles in particular next month? Let me know!
xx Bry Jaimea